Have you ever walked through a season that you thought was going to be full of joy and turned out to be a season of disappointment? Yeah me too. I found it's often hard in those moments to recall God's character and my identity in him. Doubt floods my mind and I begin to question my purpose. I begin to place blame and ask why. But then I realized that during those times of disappointment if instead of blaming God I turn closer to him, my focus shifts. My focus begins to stay eternal instead of what's happening right now. I begin to see how he's leading me and that he really does have good plans for me.
I was reminded of this recently as I was reading in John and the verse popped off the page at me in John 10:2-5. It says, "But the one who enters through the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep recognize his voice and come to him. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. After he has gathered his own flock, he walks ahead of them, and they follow him because they know his voice. They won’t follow a stranger; they will run from him because they don’t know his voice."
I love how it talks about the good shepherd leading his sheep. Then I realized that if I just listen, God is calling me and leading me. It says he goes before the sheep and calls them by name. How amazing is that to know that God is right there calling us through our disappointment and discouragement. He's in our future already and knows the plans he has for us. It's okay to be disappointed and to have those feelings, but I've learned I have to keep moving forward even when it hurts and follow his voice. I also learned that he's always teaching us something in those moments. If we take the time to hear what he's teaching us then we can make it through that season a little easier and even walk others through it.
Another thing that really helped me through this season was a song by Elevation Worship called Do it Again. I had been listening to the album and it didn't fully hit me until I was at Outcry and I heard the song live. Something in me just broke and I felt God's presence so clearly as tears just streamed down my face. I knew in that moment that everything was truly going to be okay. There were so many things that felt like they were falling apart but at that moment I knew that God had me in the palm of his hand and that I was exactly where he wanted me. The song talks about the walls of Jericho and waiting for them to fall. It goes on to talk about God's faithfulness and how he has provided before so he will do it again. That alone was so comforting because I was beginning to doubt God's plan for me and was feeling forgotten, but reflecting on the things he's done in the past and how he provided for me before gave me hope for the future.
Maybe that's you today, maybe you're feeling the same things I was and going through a similar season. I hope you know that there is a God that only wants the best for you in this life and he knows your future already because he has incredible plans for you. Take time to reflect on what he's already done and how far he's brought you. He'll do it again and this season will only make you stronger. I hope the things I learned through my season can help you through yours.That's really my goal with this blog is just to walk through life together and hope that my experiences can help others make it through theirs as well.
Father, Thank you for walking me through this season of doubt and disappointment. Thank you for your faithfulness. I know that while this season is hard, it won't last forever and I know you've got me in the palm of your hand. I'm thankful for the things that I'm learning even when I can't see you moving. Help me to continue leaning on you and seeking you even when it's hard. I trust you to help me through this season. In Jesus name, Amen.