Being the Church beyond Sunday and Building Community with Lauren Sheppard | S3 E38
Lauren Sheppard is on the leadership team at Queen City Church as well as a pastor. She oversees all the different ministries at the Church and has the opportunity to mentor many people. Lauren also worked in the corporate world for several years which allowed her to gain perspective on the needs of people outside of vocational ministry. She is a friend and encourager who is full of wisdom.
In this week's episode we talk about what it means to be the church beyond Sunday. In our jobs, in our daily life, how can we actively be the church? We aren't all in vocational ministry, but we do all represent Jesus as believers and we make up the church. Church isn't just a building or on Sundays and today's episode helps us see ways that we can be active beyond Sunday. We also talk about community and church community along with some of the struggles we face with church community. We talk again about church hurt and burn out and expectations as well. Today's episode is full of wisdom to help us in these areas and to help us continue to heal and build the church.
What you can learn in today’s episode:
How to be the church in the marketplace/ corporate world
How to be the church beyond Sundays
What it means to live out the Luke 10:2 verses
How to build community at church and some of the common issues we face
How we can better communicate our needs and expectations to avoid burnout and hurt
Links from this episode:
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Episode Transcript:
Courtney:
Lauren, thank you so much for being on the show today. I'm excited to have this conversation with you. For those of you who don't know, Lauren and I go to Queen City Church together, and I met her a few years ago, and she is on the leadership team there. And so, I wanted to ask her on the show to continue our Church series conversation. So, Lauren, tell us a little bit about yourself, who you are, what you do, and all that good stuff.
Lauren:
Yeah. Well, I'm excited and honored to have the opportunity to get to talk about the Church. It's definitely a passion. I am originally from the Oklahoma, Texas area. I grew up in Church and have honestly followed Jesus a lot of my life. And I'm thankful for that experience and hasn't always been easy. But I am so thankful. And I grew up in Church. It's been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. And in college, got connected to an amazing Church in Oklahoma and kind of through a series of events like found my calling and kind of started pursuing full time Ministry. And so I graduated College and was on staff at a couple of different churches, mostly in student Ministry. And a lot of my passions are in leadership and discipleship. And then about four years ago, I moved to Cincinnati to be a part of launching Queen City Church and have absolutely loved it. And now I oversee all of our Ministry. So I lead a team of people that directly lead kids Ministry, student Ministry, and everything that we do for groups in our Church.
Courtney:
That's awesome. You do so much, and you do a lot of great things at Church. So I appreciate your leadership, and I'm glad that you are available to have this conversation, because I know that you have a lot of wisdom to offer from just all your different experiences in life. And I know that for a season, I know you've worked mostly in Ministry, but for a season, you've also worked in the marketplace. And that's something that I would love to talk about a bit today because I know that there's a lot of listeners who maybe aren't in full time Ministry, but they are part of a Church and they are Christians and believers. And so I would love just to hear your thoughts on what is the biggest thing you learned in your marketplace experience about being the Church beyond just Sunday and beyond vocational Ministry than just any encouragement that you can offer to our listeners who may be working in the marketplace so they can be more confident being a light for God.
Lauren:
Yeah, that's a great question. When we launched our Church before, essentially the Church could support financially, like full time staff. I worked in the marketplace at a couple of different places, and honestly, it was eye opening experience because I had done Ministry for so long and so kind of went back into the quote unquote corporate world and honestly wouldn't have traded it for the world. I think it really grounded me and helped me again to connect with why we actually do what we do and what it looks like to be like Jesus all the time in your job and all that kind of stuff. So I'm deeply thankful that I had that season. So I would say I think my biggest like, and I think this is a bit of a philosophical shift or kind of like something that I think we're all challenged with is like, I think as humans, we easily define our lives into sacred and secular. And we think about sacred being things we do at Church and reading our Bible and these kind of like compartmentalized times of prayer or whatever. And then secular is kind of like everything else. And I think truly, like, following Jesus and being like him is there is no differentiation between the two. It is just who you are. And my experience was like, how do I be the same person I'm at Church on Sunday morning in the workplace? Do I have the same attitude am I kind? Am I a joy to be around? Am I asking people how they are and really meaning it? Am I caring for people? Am I doing a good job and being excellent in my work? I think it really challenged me. And I think my encouragement would be to truly be as much like Jesus in all environments, whether that's at Church or in the workplace. And I think if you truly try your best, nobody is perfect. But I think being like Jesus is so counter cultural to what is normal in our world. And I think that in and of itself speaks to people. And so I had plenty of conversations, even over time of just developing relationships with coworkers where you talk about things that are important to you or how you spend your time. And so for me, Church came up in that and was able to have some very meaningful conversations with people just through conversation and relationship. And so I think my biggest encouragement would just be to see life as a whole and not hearts and truly are calling or our goal is to be like Jesus and trying to really figure out what does that look like in my home, in my work, and when I'm at the grocery store, how am I always growing to become more like Jesus?
Courtney:
I love that because I think that so often we do try to compartmentalize the parts of our life and be like, oh, well, Sundays for this. And I'm in my Church bubble, and now I'm in my work bubble, and there really is no there shouldn't be these bubbles. And I know I've worked in the corporate world my whole career, but I've been very involved in any Church that I've been a part of. And it can be easy to just get in that Christian bubble and not really think about it as much outside of that. But I know, like you said, you just lived your life and showed the things that you are passionate about, and that happened to be God and Jesus. And that's been something true for my life, too. With work is I didn't necessarily just like walking off and be like, hey, guys, I'm a Christian and I go to Church. It just would come up in the way that I live my life or the things I would talk about. They say, like, what do you do over the weekend? I did this thing with my Church or whatever. And so then people, they listen. And eventually if somebody had something going on with their family, they'd be like, hey, I know you go to Church and I know you pray. Would you like, please keep so and so in their prayers? And so it's just little things like that. I don't think it has to be in your face kind of faith with people. I think that, like you said, living your life like Jesus really is impactful. And people take notice of that. Are there any other ways that we can be the Church beyond Sunday? Because I know that obviously churches, we go to Church on Sunday and I know at our Church we talk about Sundays affect our Mondays. And so I would love to talk a little bit about that because I know Luke tend to talks about how the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. And again, I think so often we are like, oh, I'm going to leave pastor to do that. That's their job. He can be the worker. How can we do that maybe if we're not in full time Ministry?
Lauren:
Yeah. Again, great question. And I think it's even referencing that verse that you just talked about. Like, I actually read that this week in my time with God, and it's such an inspiring verse and I think challenging verse overall. But what I noticed this week when I read it is the reason, like right before Jesus says that. It says that he was moved with compassion for people, that people were like a sheep without a shepherd. And you think about sheep and they're honestly pretty dumb and they need direction and they need someone to kind of guide them and all of those things. But I think what really stood out to me this week was like that Jesus says that because he had compassion for people. And I think simply like, I was so challenged in that even though I am a pastor and even though I do Ministry full time, it's like, am I making space in my life when I go to the grocery store to have compassion for people? I'm a pretty task oriented or get it done kind of person. And so it's easy for me to fall into that mode even in my everyday life. I think there are so many practical things that can be done, and there are times when it's good to just be a listener and there are times when it's good to say something and it's like, honestly, there is no right or wrong. I think the Holy Spirit has to guide so much of what that looks like. But I think again, I was so challenged this week of do I let compassion move me in what I do, even though the harvest is plentiful? Am I doing that to just help people know Jesus, or am I truly letting compassion, I guess, kind of be the motivation behind that? And so I think as long as your heart is in the right place, as long as you're guided by those motivations, that the actual action of it kind of comes out of that and comes out of that place of really where your heart is.
Courtney:
Yeah. I love the part about compassion because I think that that is a huge factor of it, of letting the Holy Spirit giving room for the Holy Spirit to guide you and move you in compassion. If you see somebody when you're out shopping or if you see somebody at the grocery store, maybe there's like a homeless person that you pass. And if we're not allowing ourselves to be moved by compassion, we can miss those moments sometimes and we can get focused, like you said, because I can be task oriented, too. I definitely when I go places, I'm pretty focused on like, okay, I need to buy this and do this and go to this place. And I've realized when I slow down a little and try to pay attention more, those opportunities arise because I'm open for them to happen. Is there any areas, too that you think we could work on to bridge the gap more between vocational Ministry and marketplace, any areas where it feels like there's kind of like one or the other, but we can really bridge the gaps? I know our Church does a really good job of trying to like with QCLA, the leadership program we have for business leaders. And really any leader, is there anything that churches can do to bridge some of those gaps and involve community leaders more and things like that?
Lauren:
Yeah, I think that's a great question. I know something that we have wrestled with and continue to wrestle with. And you did mention QCLA, which is something that we started just to it's a huge passion of our Church and Pastor Brian and myself that was kind of birthed out of that and just wanting to help people. But I think kind of again, it's a bit of a philosophical thing that I think we had to wrestle here a little bit and have conversation about was like, I think most churches, when they talk about leadership development, they're talking about it in regards to how do we develop leaders for our Church. And that is like a major challenge to be honest, to have leaders who are equipped to lead Ministry and are in a place spiritually and emotionally and have the skill to be able to do that. That's a lot of what I give my time to is to developing people and developing myself to be able to do that well. But I think the philosophical shift was like, okay, yes, we want to do that, and we need to do that as a Church. But how do we also come alongside these incredible leaders who have massive influence in our city and are connected to people and other networks of leaders, and how do we kind of spiritually support them and create conversation and community with other leaders who are going through some of the same challenges that they are? So, you know, I really believe we've only scratched the surface of what it could be in our city, and I've even dreamed about it being an opportunity to connect other leaders to God, and could it be something where we just through organic relationship or kind of events or networking opportunities? Is that a way that we really could be like Jesus to other leaders in our city and not make it so much about, like, building just our Church. And so I think, to be honest, I think that's pretty uncharted territory for the Capital C Church. I don't even know. I think what the future of that looks like, but I'm excited and I'm very passionate about that because I think it matters. When you talk about the Church being outside the four walls of a Sunday, it's like that's a massive way to impact our city, as if leaders in our city have, like, if they know God and they're making a difference and they're leading whatever thing that they're leading in a way that's like biblically grounded and all of that. So I think that is one of the kind of dreams in our heart as God unfolds, that to be able to really support and connect with other leaders in our city.
Courtney:
Yeah, I like that, too, because I think that it will encourage other leaders who are listening to this to implement some of that in their own cities, too, and just use that as, like a catalyst to figure out ways to connect with those leaders in their city and connect with kind of like more of the marketplace side of things to plant leaders in those different areas so they feel competent as well. And I think that can only build the Church, honestly. And switching gears a little bit, I want to talk also about community because I know that's a big I mean, all the ministries that you oversee basically are like community in our Church. And so I know it's a big part of your heart. Part of my heart, too, especially as an adult. It can be hard to make friends sometimes. It can be hard to after you're out of school to find ways to connect with people, especially like healthy relationships, too. It's not just the people when you were just forced to be around them in school. Now you have to intentionally go and find friendships. What are some ways that within Church that you think we could encourage or better build community and help people, not give up on trying to build community?
Lauren:
Yeah, I think that's a great question. And again, I think for our Church, we don't have a corner on the market. We're still learning and growing. And I think the things, again, that I'm thinking about or dreaming about and trying to figure out how to best accomplish is how do we make community, like, easy and organic, and how you would form friendships in your everyday life is how we're facilitating that. Does that reflect that? And so I think we definitely try different things, and we'll continue to try different things to make it as easy as possible. But I think my encouragement to people who are in that space, and I don't want to downplay, like, how lonely that can be. And most definitely have personally experienced seasons like that, where it's like that loneliness is like they can do something to your soul. It is a hard place to be. And obviously we believe in community the Bible talks about it's such a foundational part of who we are. And that's a whole different topic. But I think what I would encourage people is just to not give up. I think great relationships you click with certain people and why I'm sure there's some psychologists who could probably explain that better than I can. But it takes time to find those people that you really click with and connect with on a deeper level. And even beyond that, it takes time for relationships to grow. And one thing Pastor Brian, our pastor, says is any new relationship is always awkward. And it is it just takes time to really get to know someone. And it does take courage to kind of take that step of faith and to even try. And so I think I would just on the Church side, I think it's our responsibility to try to make it as easy as we can and organic and to foster as best we can ways that create that. But on the I guess the personal side or the personal side of it, I think it's the responsibility to have courage to step out and to like it is uncomfortable trying to go meet new people and just embrace it like it is what it is. And it doesn't always have to be like that. But if you're if that hasn't clicked yet or you haven't found the right community, it doesn't mean that it doesn't exist. It just takes time.
Courtney:
I think most of the time yes, I would agree with that too, because I know when I first graduated College and got invited to Church and started getting back involved in Church again for the first time in a really long time, it was hard, but I realized that the people I had been hanging out with when I wasn't following Jesus were just not the best influence of people to hang out with. And so I had gone to a College Church service before graduating and they talked about getting involved in small groups and things like that and continuing to show up. And I know whenever I went all in and went to small groups, it was awkward because I'm an introvert. And so going by myself to these groups and being in groups of people where I knew absolutely no one was really hard. But I ended up meeting some of my best friends because I pushed through the awkward and was like, hey, would you want to get dinner or coffee before small group next week or things like that? And just pushing through the awkward because I think people are always looking for a community. And so whether it's in the Church or not in the Church, I think the Church that's what Church is part of God's plan to be like a family of God and to build the Church in that way. And so I think people are craving that. And so I would encourage people don't feel awkward because everyone feels awkward, like you don't have to worry if someone's like, why did she ask me to hang out? They're honestly probably looking for a friend too. So I think be the friends that you want to be. And I know there's a whole pool of people, too that I've talked with and that have had conversations with me who they maybe joined Church and got really involved and served in all these different areas, and then they got burnt out or maybe they experienced some type of hurt through Church because either some expectation wasn't met or somebody hurt their feelings or something deeper happened at the Church, wherever it was that caused them to feel excluded. Or sometimes I've heard people mention that churches can be clicky or those types of things. What are some ways that we as a Church can try to help those areas or encourage the people who are feeling those ways so that those experiences don't lead them away from Church, but they can recover and move forward and get back involved in Church?
Lauren:
Yeah, I think, man, what a topic. I think there are so many different ways to go with that. But I think as a Church leader, I think our heart and again, I think this kind of answers both sides of the question. But at the end of the day, we are humans and we are doing our very best with what we believe God is leading us to. And I think something we value so much and every chance we get is like, God, we need you, we are dependent upon you. And it's truly not just like this cool thing to say. It's like we need the direction of God because we're too human with humans come in perfection, and that's the same way in the Church. As good as our intent is, we will always come up short. There is no exception to that. And so I think the Church has hurt a lot of people. And I think there's again, could be a whole conversation on why. And I think a lot of it has to do with doing Ministry at a certain pace that it kind of outpaces really what where God is and that kind of thing. So that's something that we constantly are talking about. It's like we don't want to outpace God. There are many decisions we make to keep things slower than we could because we want to care for people in our team and all of that. But I think for people that have experienced that, I think my encouragement would be like just a few things. One like allow God to heal you at the end of the day, like hurt is hurt, whether it's a relationship, whether it was the Church, the Church is not an institution. It's made up of people. So a lot of times I think that herd is connected to a person. So there's forgiveness, there's allowing God to heal. That I think a couple of other things are like, to be honest, be gentle with your expectations. Expect it not to be perfect. Now, it doesn't mean every Church is for you. There are people who come to our Church and it's not for them. And that is totally cool. We just want people to be connected to a Church that connects them to God. And so that's okay. But I think as a leader, sometimes it feels like the expectations that people have are so unrealistic when it's like we're just people too. We're just trying to do our very best to lead how God wants us to lead. And so I think if there is hurt, there like, maybe take ownership, check those expectations, allow God to heal. Don't be afraid to communicate. I think that as a leader, it's like even this week I had some of those conversations with people that are like their expectations haven't been met. And I want to hear those things, and I try to do that with so much, like, humility, and it's hard to hear that sometimes, but I think we want to do that with security and humility to say, like, we just want to grow too. And I think if there's that kind of mutual relationship and understanding of both sides, it creates something that is like what the Church is intended to be, which is just a community of believers that are following God and making disciples and trying to make a difference in the world. And there is no spiritual elite and not spiritual. That whole dynamic is, I think it's past its day, in my opinion, and it's just we are all people, and God's called us, and we take that calling very seriously, but we're also, at the same time just humans.
Courtney:
Yeah. I think that's a really important part of it is that we are humans. And just because someone's a Christian doesn't mean that they're perfect or that they suddenly hit this level. And it's like, well, I can't do any wrong anymore. So if I hurt you, like, sorry about it. I think it is important to remember because I've had that conversation with friends before where the term, like, Church hurt, really. It's people hurt people in the Church caused some type of hurt, and sometimes that hurt. I definitely want to validate like that hurt is real and that's painful, and there's so many different levels of hurt, and there's so much that goes on in the global Church world. But I liked what you said about taking time to heal and working through forgiveness and talking to your Church leaders and having those conversations instead of just walking away and leaving that Church. Sometimes it is a situation where maybe you do need to leave that particular Church depending on what this thing is. But I would say good leaders listen and like Lauren said, have conversations with the leaders in your Church and work together to overcome some of those different things, whether it's something that you've noticed needs to maybe change in the Church or you see an area that's like a gap because leaders don't see everything. I mean, they see as much as they can, but sometimes they don't know if an area is falling short or if there's maybe a need for this in the Church. And so I think listening is a huge thing.
Lauren:
Yeah. I would say honestly, and that's what I told the people I was talking with this week. That's the hardest part of what for me is just gaining perspective. I have a perspective, but from where I'm at an organization to how that plays out in just people's lives here, attending the Church sometimes could be so vastly different than the intention or the vision that we have. And so I want that perspective. But I think people assume they already know or they're aware of the experience, and it's like, no, it can be very disconnected sometimes.
Courtney:
Yeah. Pastor Brian talks about closing the gap, and I think that's an example of that is like Church leaders may see one area, and as Church members or people in the Church, we may see other areas and have those differing expectations. And so it's kind of the whole, you don't know what you don't know, saying your leaders may not know what they don't know or they may not see everything until you tell them. And I think it's good not to assume that they're seeing it, because I think that's where in any relationship we can get into trouble being like, oh, well, they knew that and they already meant that. And it's like you talk to them and they're like, no, I had no idea. I'm so sorry. Right. And on the other side of that, too, I'd love for you just to give some encouragement to leaders and pastors that are in a position to care for the people of the Church, because I feel like there's a lot happening in the Church world right now. And I feel like pastors and leaders can get discouraged at times, and they need encouragement, too, because there is a lot of heat on pastors at times to be perfect and all of that. So I love just some encouragement for any pastors or leaders listening to walk away just feeling a little better than maybe they came in today.
Lauren:
Yeah. I think it is such a unique calling and experience to lead the Church, especially in the culture and the age and the time of the world that we live in right now. And I think I would just always encourage you to stay true to what God has called you to do. It can be easy to get caught up in frustration or discouragement or culture, like so many things, it can be very discouraging at times, but I think I always simply and as humbly as I can say, go back to, like, I want to please God. People can say what they want. They cannot say what they want. Like, they cannot know anything about our Church. And that's fine. I think my heart is like, I want to see him before Jesus, and I want to please him. And I think if we live our lives that way and kind of quiet the noise, we can finish our race. Like, there's a way to do it. And the Church is needed now more than any other time in history, I believe. And so the calling is important, and it's significant, and the world needs what the Church has and the true sense of what the Church is. And so I think the importance of what we do cannot be diminished. But I think at times, I think for me, I would just encourage people to quiet the noise and truly fix our eyes on Jesus. What we do is for the pleasure of God, and that's it, to just stay true to that, to stay true to the calling, to stay faithful to it, and we do it with such devotion because it's for Jesus.
Courtney:
Yeah, I think that's so good. I think anytime that we feel like the heaviness of the world or we feel like maybe even just, like, attacked because the larger capital C Church gets attacked or something like that, I think it can be easy to get our eyes off the prize of, like, okay, God called me to do this, and it's for God's glory. And I have a mission. And so I think that that's so good to constantly come back to our why and our mission to stay encouraged. Is there anything else that you would like to leave the listeners with today or any final wisdom or encouragement?
Lauren:
Don't give up on the Church. I love the conversation today. And again, I think right now in culture, and there is so much being said about the Church, and some of it is so warranted and needed. And I think in God's Grace there's such a purifying thing that could be happening in the Church right now that I think is significant of really getting back to, like, this is what it means at the core of what it is, and I think that's necessary, and it's painful and hard sometimes, but I do think it's the Grace of God that kind of is leading us back to that. But I think my encouragement is like, I want to be someone who doesn't point fingers or critique. I want to be someone who picks up a hamburger and builds. And I think my encouragement to people would be like, whatever that looks like, whatever that passion is, whatever way that you can find healing and take your time, but help be a part of building the Church and I don't just mean inside the four walls But I mean in everyday life, like being like Jesus in our everyday life. And so I think I would encourage people with that don't give up on it. It is so significant and needs to be built more now than ever before.
Courtney:
Yeah, that's so good. Well, thank you so much for being here today, being on the show, sharing your wisdom. I know that this is going to help both people in the Church and Ministry leaders and leaders at all levels. So I'm just so appreciative of your time today, Lauren.
Lauren:
Of course I had such a great time talking to you.
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